So my new job is in a private art gallery in someone's home. And by
home, I mean overly designed architectural marvel. And by marvel, I mean
that it's, uh, special. Unique. Ok, it's just straight-up fucked up,
really. The building is shaped like a parallelogram. Well, actually,
it's a rhomboid, not
just a parallelogram. So there are no 90 degree angles anywhere in the
building, and everything, from the furnishings to the fixtures, is
custom-made. It may sound pretty cool, but there are some
pain-in-the-ass quirks about it for someone who works in such a
contrived and unusual structure.
For starters, I work on the basement level. On the south end of the
basement level, the ceiling (or the floor of the ground-floor level) is
actually a series of plexiglass skylights that let in a lot of natural
light. So much light, in fact, that they had to install custom
sunscreens on all of them. Not only because of the light and resulting
heat, but more importantly because the homeowners store their textiles
on the south end, and textiles are easily damaged by light. Meanwhile,
the north end of the basement level, where the offices and kitchen are,
and where someone like me works 40 hours a week, has no windows or
natural light of any kind. It's a mind-boggling arrangement. Valuable
textiles' exposure to light should be minimized as much as possible,
whereas natural light is good for a healthy work environment for people.
So why they didn't just flip the arrangement, and put offices on the
south end and textiles on the dark north end, is beyond me. I would say
it's just a decision that the owners made after the architect left the
scene, but I know how the owners work. They stay on their help
employees, contractors, groundskeepers, and architects like a hawk. And
there was a clear and conscious decision to place the office spaces on
the north end. There are no rooms at the south end - the textiles are
displayed along partitions, not walls or within interior rooms.
Beyond the appropriation of space on the basement level, there's also
an issue with the furnishings. Every single furnishing is a built-in.
While my office is beautiful - sleek glass and dark black countertops -
there are some problems. My desk is also a rhomboid to remain parallel
to the interior and exterior walls. Have you ever tried to cut a perfect
90 degree angle on a surface that's a rhomboid? Give it a go and tell
me how that works out for you. And everything is fixed. Also, the
surfaces are all at a fixed height (which is exactly the wrong height
for me), so I'm developing carpal tunnel. When I adjust my chair height
so that the seat has me at the appropriate spot, there's only a couple
inches clearance under the table. And try as I might, my thighs are not a
mere 2". Finally, there are some major oversights in terms of
accommodating basic needs. Because all storage is also built-in, there
are no wall hooks, no closets. Where am I supposed to hang my jacket or
put my wet umbrella?
It's utterly baffling, because I'm left to think that either the
architect missed some key details in terms of thinking about how people
would work in and use the space (as this level was specifically designed
for the homeowners' hired help), or that the architect's attempts to
incorporate such improvements was entirely overridden by the homeowners.
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